Thought Patterns

What Are the Major Predictors of Divorce?

It’s not easy to think about major predictors of divorce because finding your soulmate has become an impossible task for most. Even those that think they’ve found it only come to find that it wasn’t what they were hoping for all along. When we start to have doubts about our marriages and relationships, there will always be an overlaying issue that isn’t being examined. 

While we are bound to make bad decisions and judgements when getting involved in relationships with other people, we often have a tough time embracing the fact that we screwed up. Instead of allowing something to drag on longer than it should, sometimes it’s best to spot our mistake before it’s too late. 

When we can spot them early enough, we allow ourselves an opportunity to work things out and find areas of improvement to better our relationships moving forward. Let’s look through some of the major predictors of divorce and signs that confrontation or counseling might be needed.

5 Major Predictors Of Divorce

Harsh Startups

When we think of harsh startups, we imagine a discussion with our significant other that stems from criticism and contempt in order to get our message across. When a discussion starts with a harsh startup, it is highly unlikely for that conversation to end on a good note. 

The more we find ourselves using harsh startups with our partners, the more likely we are experiencing a struggling relationship that needs work. These discussions will normally follow the same template every time: starting with criticism, moving on to contempt, then comes the defensiveness, and ending with stonewalling ( withdrawing from the conversation).

Emotional Flooding

Emotional flooding can be damaging in a relationship because it will often lead to a harsh startup or turn a constructive conversation into a destructive one. When we start to say erratic things out of context, it’s normally due to emotional flooding.

It’s a scientific fact that it becomes increasingly difficult for humans to process social interactions when our heart rate is elevated to 100BPM or more. When this happens in an argument or discussion with your significant other, it can cause you to say things out of impulse that only bring about more consequences to the situation. 

Body Language

It’s easy to lie to someone with the words we say, but it’s very difficult to hide your true feelings through your body language. Most of the time, our body language will tell the real story and avoiding these signs can only leave you avoiding the inevitable. 

Constantly turning away from each other, not walking close to each other, crossing your arms when speaking with one another, these are all signs that there is something wrong in your relationship. You can tell someone you love them as much as you want, but your body has to follow suit.

Bad Memories

Lastly, bringing up bad memories and bad past experiences constantly can be an indicator that there isn’t enough happiness in the relationship. This is especially true when bringing up past failed attempts at repairing your relationship. 

If you’re constantly finding the negative things in a relationship outweighing the positive things, it could be time to do some reflecting on what it is you want out of your relationship. If you’re not getting it and discussions with your partner aren’t going anywhere, moving on could be the best thing for your future. 

It’s never too late to do something good for yourself, you just have to know when it’s needed and have the proper guidance through it all. Pay attention to the major predictors of divorce.